#to ~*~cope~*~
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My grandfather and my godfather (a beloved neighbor and dear family friend) had a long standing bet- for one dollar- about who would die first. Both of them being slightly pessimistic (in the funny way), they both insisted that they themselves would be the first to die. Any time my grandfather had a health scare, he’d gleefully call up my godfather to boast that he’d be passing “any day now” and he was sure to win the bet. It was a big family joke and they were always amiably sparring and comparing notes about who was in worse shape, medically speaking.
When my grandfather was in hospice care dying of liver cancer, my godfather was quite ill also. It took him great effort to make the journey to see his dying friend. As he came into the room, supported by a family member, he shuffled to my grandpa’s bedside and silently handed him a dollar bill. He was ceding his loss of the bet, as they both knew who was going first. My grandpa had been in quite bad shape for a while and was no longer able to speak but let me tell you he snatched that dollar with unexpected strength and literally laughed aloud. He knew exactly what the gesture meant and he couldn’t help but find the humor within the grief. It was the last time any of us heard my grandpa laugh, as he passed shortly after.
When I talk about my appreciation for “dark humor” I’m not so much thinking about edgy jokes, but rather the human instinct to somehow, impossibly, both find and appreciate the absurdity that is so often folded into the profound grief of life and death. When I tell this story I think it kind of perturbs people sometimes, but it’s honestly one of my favorite memories about two men I really deeply admired. I could never hope for anything more than for my loved ones to remember me laughing until the very end, and taking joy in a little joke as one of my final acts.
#I think almost anyone in medicine will understand this#to absent friends!#gallows humor is a very human way to cope#death#grief#dark humor#illness
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I’m about to save you thousands of dollars in therapy by teaching you what I learned paying thousands of dollars for therapy:
It may sound woo woo but it’s an important skill capitalism and hyper individualism have robbed us of as human beings.
Learn to process your emotions. It will improve your mental health and quality of life. Emotions serve a biological purpose, they aren’t just things that happen for no reason.
1. Pause and notice you’re having a big feeling or reaching for a distraction to maybe avoid a feeling. Notice what triggered the feeling or need for a distraction without judgement. Just note that it’s there. Don’t label it as good or bad.
2. Find it in your body. Where do you feel it? Your chest? Your head? Your stomach? Does it feel like a weight everywhere? Does it feel like you’re vibrating? Does it feel like you’re numb all over?
3. Name the feeling. Look up an emotion chart if you need to. Find the feeling that resonates the most with what you’re feeling. Is it disappointment? Heartbreak? Anxiety? Anger? Humiliation?
4. Validate the feeling. Sometimes feelings misfire or are disproportionately big, but they’re still valid. You don’t have to justify what you’re feeling, it’s just valid. Tell yourself “yeah it makes sense that you feel that right now.” Or something as simple as “I hear you.” For example: If I get really big feelings of humiliation when I lose at a game of chess, the feeling may not be necessary, but it is valid and makes sense if I grew up with parents who berated me every time I did something wrong. So I could say “Yeah I understand why we are feeling that way given how we were treated growing up. That’s valid.”
5. Do something with your body that’s not a mental distraction from the feeling. Something where you can still think. Go on a walk. Do something with your hands like art or crochet or baking. Journal. Clean a room. Figure out what works best for you.
6. Repeat, it takes practice but is a skill you can learn :)
#deconstruction#ex christian#ex evangelical#agnosticatheist#deconstructing christianity#agnostic#ex religious#exevangelical#religious trauma#trauma#cptsd#therapy#life skills#leftist#self healing#healing is a process#Emdr#emdr therapy#ifs therapy#emotional regulation#emotional health#heading#trauma therapy#religious trauma syndrome#anti capitalist#humanism#coping mechanism#coping skills#cult survivor#deconvert
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#ще й і іграшка-обіймашка для сну!! (@kawoid) так!!
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(✿◕‿◕) die (ꈍ ꒳ ꈍ✿)
#MY GIRLLLLLLLL <333333 you're doing amazing sweetie kill them all you deserve to#anyway. coping mechanism. the problems in my life i could solve if society just let me have a death note#this show really is an exercise in patience and suffering i get SO squicked out#by how much the horrible characters and situations mirror the insanity of what's happening in real life#also the revelation that some of the actors are Exactly as shitty as their characters are is. ugh.#but every time i'm like okay i can't take it i need to stop to protect my headspace#i think of kimiko and am like.... no... i need to see my gir....#hope karen gets jucy roles in other shows too PLEASE#the boys#kimiko miyashiro#karen fukuhara#theboysedit#tvedit
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"Self insert characters are cringe"
Bro I'm trying to survive capitalism with maladaptive daydreaming. Leave me alone.
#self insert#maladaptive daydreaming#no shame#cringe safe zone#im trying to exist in a hellscape okay#mom said its my turn to pick the coping mechanism
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price with reader who never got much attention as a kid/growing up??
very self indulgent but hear me out. price is a lover man. he takes his time for his partners, gives them what they need, even if he's busy. you on the other hand are simply used to being put aside, people only listening to you half heartedly, not looking at you and getting distracted when you talk, other things were always more important than you and you felt that. you got used to it, it's normal to you.
but when you're with price he's the total opposite. he looks at you intently when you talk (if not hes leaning his head towards you so he hears you better), putting things down when you ask him something - hes attentive. he listens. and its absolutely strange to you, it makes you feel flustered, kinda watched. at some point you ask him why hes looking at you like that, the tv running in the backround. he furrows his eyebrows at you, with a confused chuckle. "what do you mean, love?"
"you're starin' at me." you accuse him, your cheeks getting hot.
"you're talkin' to me. where else would I be looking?" he jokes with a soft chuckle, wondering what the hell you're on about.
"your show's on." you say, gesturing to the tv. he looks at you like youve got three heads.
"I'm listening to you, love."
#is this anything at all#or is it just me coping#we'll see#gothghostiie#cod mw#cod mw2#cod mwii#call of duty#cod#cod mw3#cod mwiii#john price#John price x reader#price x reader#price#captain john price#captain price#captain john price x reader#captain price x reader
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POV: you wake up from a mouse bite induced coma
#sedate me please#I’ve completely gone off the rails#exams are over so my brain is finding ways of coping#tw Greg house#hilson#house Md#hatecrimes md#hate crimes md#huddy#james wilson#Greg house#gregory house#Lisa cuddy#Cameron#robert chase#allison cameron#Eric foreman#rsl#robert sean leonard#Hugh Laurie#puckspoetry
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Once again, I'm in trouble with my only friend She is papering the windowpanes She is putting on a smile Living in a glasshouse
#PRE-EP7 COPE#louis watch out LOUIS WATCH OUT#iwtv#interview with the vampire#the vampire armand#tvc#iwtv season 2#iwtv spoilers#armand#alibonbonn#alidraws
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DEVASTATING the lyric you've been mishearing is better than the real one
#i've been listening to icarus by bastille#and for some reason my brain fills in 'this is how it feels to take a fall' as 'this is how it feels to take off all your skin'#and like fuck man#and I KNOW that’s technically not a misheard lyric but my post my rules cope#anyway my line now#also probably phrased this poorly but its ok#im allowed to be incomprehensible#as a treat#and then fuckin#from we sink by of monsters and men#the original line was 'please look away dont look at me'#and i kept hearing it as 'please learn a way to look at me'#anyway#shoving this post in the queue but please be aware that i am writing it very late at night#q
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Simon didn’t like to hold you. He liked to be held.
At first, you didn’t understand why he’d turn his back to you in bed without saying anything. You thought you’d done something to him, or maybe he was in a bad mood. You couldn’t be any more wrong.
Simon Riley, an absolute brute of a soldier, was silently asking for you to be the big spoon. You nearly didn’t believe it when he finally brought it to your attention.
He was too embarrassed to ask you, so he’d resort to flipping on to his side and wait. And wait. Until he realized you didn’t catch the memo, even after many hopeless attempts.
In his mind, he thought being the big spoon would somehow convince you he wasn’t manly enough, as if his title in the service or his pure stature wasn’t proof enough of his masculinity.
To him, being held was a blanket of security. Where he’d always have to watch his back out on the field, both literally and metaphorically, he didn’t have to keep an eye out at all times with you. It was a chance for him to find solace in a person, and when he explained this to you, he was surprised to find you so willing.
And oh, when it happened, Simon nearly kicked himself for holding back on verbalizing it for so long.
The warmth of your arms when they wrapped around him from behind, your face buried between his shoulder blades, legs tangled in his, he thought that this was what inner peace felt like.
He was silly to think you’d ever be the one to judge him for what most deemed ‘unmasculine’. In all of his broad glory, he felt safe the moment you held him, like a child does when they feel a mother’s embrace except it was from someone he loved dearest to his heart.
And you? You found that being the big spoon was rather enjoyable when the man you’re holding was so damn comfortable to snuggle up to. It was a win-win for you both.
You just wished he wasn’t an idiot that left you wondering all those hopeless nights until the truth came out.
#angie’s rambles#i want a cuddle from my lover but i’m sick#so this is how i cope#call of duty#cod#cod x reader#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#simon riley#ghost cod#simon ‘ghost’ riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost simon riley#simon ghost x reader#ghost drabble#cod ghost#ghost x reader#i love soft simon
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low quality jjk trio i know you needed
part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13, part 14, part 15, part 16, part 17, part 18, part 19, part 20
#this is how i cope#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#itadori yuji#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#kugisaki nobara#megumi fushiguro#yuji itadori#jjk meme#chosoyuki#satosugu#choso kamo#jjk yuki#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#geto suguru#suguru geto#nanami kento#kento nanami#yuki tsukumo#itafushikugi#jjk memes
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He's very easily peer pressured
(Edit: I meant by the goats)
Prints!
#gos2spoilers#I mean I literally just wrote down a spoiler#good omens#good omens 2#good omens 2 fanart#good omens fanart#crowley fanart#Coping with the ending by bullying Crowley#Triangle headed Mia Thermopolis ass demon#i love him#onioneyezart
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Help, Epic the musical (specifically Hermes and his stupid pigeon laugh) has me on a chokehold
#epic the musical#fanart#hermes#greek mythology#the odyssey#im coping till the next saga#don't mind me
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Gangle's Gift! [Comic]
⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎… ⋙
#fanart#the amazing digital circus#tadc#tadc fanart#tadc pomni#tadc gummigoo#funnygummy#gummigoo x pomni#funnygummi#coping#comic#original comic#tadc gangle#pomni#gummigoo#gangle#pomni x gummigoo
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